7 Dominant Commands You Can Give Your Sub By Text Message

7 examples of dom sub text messages commands you can use to dominate her remotel

Domming someone remotely isn’t easy. Sometimes you just can’t think of any new ideas of what to text them.

This list should help you out. I’ve tried all of these messages and had great results.

Before you dominate your girl via text I must preface this article by saying you will only get a positive reaction if the person you are sending them to has AGREED to a D/s dynamic with you.

Do NOT send these to a woman you’ve been on one date with and think she might be into it. It’s the fastest way to be blocked and potentially have a sexual harassment case brought against you!

Dom and sub dynamics only work once consent has been given. Within a Dom/sub arrangement, a text message which prior to would be considered sleazy, rude, creepy, pushy, aggressive and misogynistic can become sexy, enticing, arousing, dominant and a huge turn on after consent; when your sub trusts you and knows you have both of your best interests at heart. Read up on how to be a good Dom if you are unsure what I mean.

Oh, and dominant commands are slightly different than submissive rules. Learn more in my Submissive Rules: A Complete Guide to Setting Rules for Subs (with Examples) article.

Disclaimers out of the way, let’s get stuck into seven dominant commands you can send your sub woman over text.

Disclaimers out of the way, let’s get stuck into seven dominant commands you can send your sub woman over text.
Got some create dominant commands? I want to hear them!x

1. Write a note and put it in your panties

Morning, Kitten. Grab a small, square piece of paper and a pen. Daddy’s got a job for you. Write “I am always a good girl for my Daddy” on the paper, fold it up, and wear it in your panties today for me. Don’t remove it until I text you later.

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ddlg note I'm a good girl for my daddy

Change the language to suit your dom sub dynamic, but the principle stays the same. I love this one because it encompasses many different aspects of submission.

Firstly, you are making her write an affirmation – “I am always a good girl for my Daddy”, or something that highlights her submissiveness to you. Decide if you want to help her grow (use a positive affirmation) or want to turn her on (use a sexual affirmation).

Need some ideas on what to get her to write? Here are a few:

  • I’m a good pet for my Master
  • I’m a good little slut
  • I’ve been a bad girl and deserve to be punished (this is a great one if you have a sub who loves being disciplined and are seeing her later that day to dish it out. Make her wear the paper as a reminder of what’s coming)
  • I will suck my Master’s cock for twenty minutes whilst he watches TV
  • I am an obedient servant to my Master
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Secondly, she is having to write the text out. If she identifies as a little she’ll love this task, and may even slip into littlespace as she decides what colour pen to use.

2. Wear a butt plug shopping

You need more anal training to serve me better. Wear a butt plug whilst grocery shopping today. Text to a photo to prove you are wearing it.

anal training a submissive woman with a butt plug

Wearing a butt plug at home or in public is taboo, which makes it incredibly hot. As your sub walks around she’ll constantly have that feeling of fullness, reminding her how wonderful it’s going to feel when you take her. It’s also a great way to train your sub for anal sex.

I recommend buying a set of training butt plugs and start with the smallest one. Don’t command her to shove in the biggest right away. Ease her into it.

Mood Naughty 1 Butt Plug Trainer Set

I also recommend butt plugs with t-shaped bases, not round. They are designed for comfort and to be worn for longer periods of time.

Anal training takes a while, but it’ll be worth it, I promise.

3. Make her drink her water 

I want you to drink 5 tall glasses of water by 6pm today. Send me a photo of you refilling the glass each time.

“Water!? That’s not sexy” I hear you cry.

Not all dom sub interactions need to be sexual you know. As a Dom, you might also like to use your persuasive powers for good. You could help her be more healthy by eating more vegetables, ban her from sugary drinks, or make her go to the gym three times a week.

Caution: Because these are non-sexual tasks she may be a bit startled if you text her this out of the blue. Only text something like this if you know she enjoys a non-sexual D/s dynamic, and you’ve discussed your boundaries together.

4. Make her wear your favourite outfit

When you meet me tonight for dinner I want you to be wearing the black tattoo choker you know I like, your red, short skirt, and a black long-sleeved poloneck tucked in to it. No panties in case I need easy access to you.

You’re meeting her for date night. Why not spice up the evening by requesting she wears the outfit she looks hottest in to you. She won’t need to stress about what to wear to look nice for you (some subs find making decisions very stressful so make it easy for her), she’ll be turned on by dressing up for you, and you’ll enjoy how gorgeous she looks.

Sparks will fly.

5. Choose her clothes for the day

Send me photos of three tops you like. I’ll pick which one you wear today.

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Similar to choosing her full outift but slightly easier. You’re a bloke, you may not have been paying much attention to all the clothes she owns. This is a way to dom her remotely without knowing the inner workings of her wardrobe. She narrows down the choices, but you have the final say.

Make sure the top you choose is practical for the plans she has that day. In other words, don’t make her wear a top that puts her boobs out there for everyone to see if she’s going for a family lunch.

6. Orgasm denial

Starting today, and for this entire week, your orgasms belong to me. No coming without asking me if you can play with yourself first. Understand, little girl?

Denying her orgasms is a form of punishment. If she plays with herself regularly this’ll be tricky for her! The benefit of doing this is that when you do finally meet up, she’ll take out all her pent up sexual frustration on you and you’ll have amazing sex and she’ll come extra hard (read about giving her more intense orgasms).

One of the hottest things a sub has said to me: “Daddy, I’ve got something to tell you. I couldn’t help play with myself yesterday. I got too squirmy thinking about you.” Naturally I gave her several hard spanks for her lack of discipline (she asked me to in fact!) but her owning up was so sweet yet sexual it was a massive turn on.

7. Kneeling, mouth open selfie

Get on your knees and take a photo of yourself looking up at the camera, mouth open, tongue out. I want to imagine what I’ll be fucking later. You have two hours.

Send this at a random time of the day for maximum effect. She’ll be whisked out of the everyday and plunged into submissive mode. And the time limit amps up the pressure to serve you. If she’s at work she’ll have to sneak off to the bathroom to snap a pic, and if she’s home alone you may even get a naked selfie back.

You can make her send you a photo of whatever position you want, but make it a practical one that is achievable.

More examples of dominant text messages?

So there you have it. Sending dominant text messages commanding your sub is a lot of fun, and can keep the spice alive in a D/s relationship when you can’t be together.

There are hundreds of messages you could send, and I’m sure you’ve got some great ones, dear reader. So leave me a comment below with the hottest command you’re sent as a Dom or received as a sub.

Psst: I’ve written a whole other article with some more kinky, dirty text messages you can send your sub. Go check it out.

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not a misogynistic freak

these are extremely misogynistic why does the sub have to be the woman? like why was it automatically assumed to be a woman😐

Stray

As a switch I had absolutely no doubt that this article was written to apply to both men and women. When I read articles be women they write from the woman’s perspective. Why can’t a man do the same. Women who want equal rights shouldn’t demand men go above and beyond to prove they aren’t misogynistic. That is easily determined by looking at them in their entirety. It couldn’t have been more clear that this isn’t the case with this man. Everything he rights exudes thoughtfulness for a submissive and it goes without saying that the submissive could be a man. But as a man it’s only natural to write from that perspective. Good grief….

Kristal

I love this site, I don’t find it misogynistic. In fact in many places Chief makes every effort to show why D/s is not an aspect of misogynism, and write paragraphs to denote the importance of A/gender inclusivity. It’s not hard to just switch the gender in your mind, and I say this as a lesbian Domme with a non-binary partner.

People are allowed to speak from, and express from the basis of their own lived experience, rather than from a place that caters to *your* potential future experiences.

Mill

Yeah. I was looking for femme-Dom commands bc I’m thinking about making my friend my sub 🤣

Jojo

The note idea is inspired, but I find the article as a whole is far too male-centric. The “You’re a bloke” line was particularly presumptuous. For a top quality article I’d suggest using gender neutral terms and avoiding mentions of genitalia.

Brandon

If he is writing from his perspective, then it’s going to be just that. D/s isn’t specific to any gender or preference, but in his relationship it is between a male and a female, or at least people who identify as such. Most of us want to read about another’s experiences from their point of view, not something over edited into new speak to the point of being incomprehensible.

Meranda

Thank you! Like why are people telling others how to edit their experience?

BraveDave

Dude – awesome suggestions. Why the transgenders below are even searching for and reading this article is beyond me… and then getting offended? It’s laughable. The world needs more confident and dominant men, and ideas like these are part of the training. As you note, it’s only with consent. Male confidence and leadership in relationship is part of male/female polarity, and sorely lacking in today’s “me too” paranoid world. I don’t care what the whiners say … keep up the good work!!

Domino

Ew shut up, Dave. Back in your archaic box.

Kevin

You, your sexism, and your transphobia are not welcome in this space nor any other kink space.

Last edited 2 months ago by Kevin
Kristal

Confidence and leadership forms part of the directional-guiding/ open-recieving polarity. This deeply rooted psychological dynamic exists pre gender, is not inherently tied to any gender, and in many ways transcends a persons understanding of gender, relating to deeper, integral senses of who they are.

Disengage your gross transphobia and sexism from our beautiful, unfurling sexual dynamics of dominance and submission, you wet fucking flannel of a man.

Hannah

hey so this boy wants me to be his Dom on snapchat only for 5K a month but I have no idea how to be a Dom and what to say. someone help??

rob

Is he nigerian?

Arvit

Good Evening and Greetings from Germany!
First of all I want to thank you for these great articles of yours, especially for this one. I don´t see my sub very often cause she is far away from me and this stuff helps me a lot. Of course I could give her tasks and training via. What´s App or Video Call but I don´t want it to be this one sided. Any Idea how I could give something back to her?

nici

yeah.. give her attention, give her something to think about and don’t punish her too long by holding it back thinking its one sided. My dom been holding back and its frustrating me a lot as i don’t come without his permission and not been asking for it either as I like him to initiate it as that excites me more. i am new at this. i await further instruction.

Nikita

My Daddy sends text like some of those above. I do like it.

Phil

So one time I had a fun story with a girl I was going to meet up with in a week or two and had been doing stuff over text (woo college life). We used Snapchat so I could ask for snaps whenever and also know if a text had been read. For context she’s also a brat and was exploring pain. This instance she had been sending a few photos with some attitude to them. I.e want to see breasts and she’s covering them with middle fingers up. Cute, funny, but clearly, not the right idea, so I asked for one of her naked and she said no, just out of being a brat. I gave the text “every minute I wait, will be a minute spent in an impact play session when I visit” she looked, and then a minute after I saw she read it, “One.” I texted the minutes past, and it took her 8 minutes but I got my photo. And she got her 8 minutes of flogging. So you can even create a sense of urgency as long as you’re both in a situation to respond to texts quickly.