I Have Kink X. Am I normal?

Do I disagree with female Dominants?

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What does normal even mean?

Yes, chances are you are relatively normal, despite a kink you might have which isn’t mainstream.

It doesn’t make you a bad or immoral person for wanting to do something which society deems abnormal or not part of mainstream sexuality or relationships.

What matters most is how you feel about your kink.

If it is something you want to try because you think you’ll enjoy, doesn’t involve anything illegal, and is completely consensual (you’re not being forced in to it) then play away!

Who really cares if it isn’t normal, as long as you’re having fun.

When comparing a traditional sexual relationship with a dom sub one, you are going to be doing things which vanilla couples probably don’t. If you’re comparing yourself to what is normal, then you’re not going to have a very fulfilling relationship because you’ll have a constant nagging in your head making your feel guilt or shame.

Exploring your kinks is a very rewarding experience when approached with a curiosity mindset.

They are what make you, you.

And there will be a partner out there who is a great match for you, and wants to partake in your kinks.

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Whilst there are certain kinks which are by definition common in a dom sub relationship (for example, wanting to be dominated, duh), the wide variety of different types of dominants and submissives and styles of dynamic result in a plethora of kinks.

A rope bunny obviously has a kink for rope and being restrained. A sadist dom has a kink for inflicting pain. A Master has a kink for objectifying and being served. A purely sexual dom sub power exchange might involve choking, impact play, spanking, bondage, anal, and a whole host of other activities.

These are all kinks, and whilst not mainstream, are considered the mainstay of dom sub relationships.

But that doesn’t mean those are the only kinks being have. If you think your kink is weird then head over to Fetlife and/or Google and do a search. I bet you’ll find at least a dozen other people who have the same kink.

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Ultimately your kink may not be mainstream, but that doesn’t make you a bad person or abnormal. It’s just a part of who you are and learning to accept that will lead you to more open and fulfilling relationships in the long run.

The Art of Submission. A course for beginner submissives
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