What Does it Mean When a Dom Collars a Sub?

when a dom collars a sub

When a Dom (dominant) collars a sub (submissive) it is a sign that the sub belongs to the Dom in some way. To what extent depends on agreed upon boundaries and the type of submissive you want to be in your BDSM relationship.

For example, some subs may only want to wear a BDSM collar in the bedroom. A Dom would collar his sub before the start of the play session (referred to as a scene) to indicate from that moment on she must follow their agreed upon rules. Once the scene is over, the collar is removed.

blindfolded submissive woman wearing bdsm collar
Kneeling blindfolded wearing your collar for your Master is the ultimate for a sub. Photo by Ali Saadat on Unsplash

Other subs may want more 24/7 style of BDSM relationship, where they always wear a collar. Their Dom would collar them during a collaring ceremony when they have proved loyal and up to the task. From that moment on the sub would wear the collar.

Just because a Dom has collared his sub, it doesn’t mean she must wear the same one everyday. Many choose different BDSM collars for different settings. You might wear a subtle lace choker as a day collar in public which goes with your outfit and wouldn’t draw unnecessary attention to yourself, but still holds significance for you and your Dom.

A sub woman wearing a BDSM collar
A BDSM collar on a submissive woman. Image credit: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Collar_(BDSM)

In private you might opt for a more conspicuous leather BDSM collar with the classic D-ring (for leash attachment). And during a BDSM scene you might were an even more restrictive collar, designed to only be worn for a short time.

The choice is up to you and your Dom (probably your Dom to be fair if you’re submissive ;)).

So ultimately, what does it mean when a Dom collars a sub? It means he trusts you enough to carry out your duties, and he is pleased with your ability to serve him so far.

Wearing your collar should make you feel happy as a sub, knowing that you are pleasing your Dom, and that your Dom wants to own you, hence has taken the time to provide you with a collar.

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I gave a collar to my sub last week. We are still working on some of the details as it was a surprise gift – one that I was fairly confident would be accepted in the way it was given. It was to be worn during our private time only. I was also clear within myself that if it was problematic in anyway for my sub, we would postpone, negotiate, or let slip away. The collar was a cheap but sturdy dog collar from a dollar store. It was a beginners item purchased with an eye t the future. I will use the collar as an acknowledgement of our movement forward along our chosen path. Next, hopefully without too much complication, we will identify the indicators we will be using to inventory our relationship and it’s progress. We will consider key spots for new and improved collars along the way. As the relationship grows, we will retire the old collars and together decide on the next one until we reach “the final collar.” I am beginning to keep my eye out for that ultimate goal of a collar already. I look forward to seeing a succession of collars on our playroom wall and the “final collar” around my sub’s neck.


An she will wind up like me, his little petgirl with a collar locked on an youell keep the key, karen