Ready to inject a kinky spark into your relationship?
Whether you’re just curious about BDSM or already dipping your toes in, trying new positions can be a fun way to explore trust, control, and connection with your partner.
Don’t worry – this isn’t about complicated knots or extreme moves. These are approachable, exciting ways to experiment that anyone can try (except for the last one on the list!)
Here are 8 BDSM sex positions that can add a touch of thrill to your relationship. Remember, it’s all about going slow, feeling safe, and having fun together.
1. The Spread Eagle
Imagine lying on your back with your arms and legs stretched out wide. In this position, the person lying down (the “sub”) is sort of giving up control and letting their partner (the “Dom”) explore every inch. You can make it simple by holding their hands, or try tying their wrists and ankles to the bed for a safe, all-access experience.
You might want to check out my article on under bed restraints for a quick way to secure your partner.
Why it’s fun: It’s about letting go, feeling free, and giving your partner full permission to explore.
2. Doggy Style with a Twist
You’ve heard of doggy style, but adding a small twist – like gently holding your partner’s wrists or tying their hands behind their back – takes this classic move to a new level. This twist makes things feel extra playful and can be perfect for a bit of control and excitement.
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Be careful when holding their hands, because it forces their face down onto the bed which can cause neck strain. As long as you’re careful and don’t keep your partner in this position for too long you’ll be fine. Consider propping up their torso with a pillow of sex toy like a Liberator Wedge.
Why it’s fun: The “sub” feels vulnerable while the “Dom” can set the pace and bring a little more heat. The sub has the feeling of being helpless and unable to get away – great if you are into CNC.
3. The Kneeling Chair
This one’s a bit like “over the chair” – the sub kneels on a sturdy chair and leans forward over the backrest. This puts them at a perfect angle for their partner to tease, tickle, or give a little pat here and there. Wrists can be gently tied to the chair legs, keeping things exciting without getting too complicated.
A padded chair works best otherwise it’s a bit sore on the knees.
Why it’s fun: It’s like setting up for a fun surprise! You’re kneeling, waiting, and not knowing exactly what comes next.
4. The Lap Straddle
Want to feel close and connected? This move has the sub straddling their partner’s lap, facing them. It’s intimate and allows lots of eye contact, which can be super intense. If you want a little extra control, the sub can cross their wrists behind their back, or even try a loose belt around their waist.
Why it’s fun: It’s the ultimate “close but controlled” position, where you’re close enough to feel every heartbeat (and every little instruction!).
5. Over the Bed
This one’s all about feeling supported but slightly exposed. The sub leans over the edge of the bed with their upper body resting on the mattress and hips up, making it perfect for a little light spanking or a soft massage. Wrists or ankles can be loosely tied to the bed frame to keep things playful and safe.
Why it’s fun: It feels secure yet a little daring, with all the benefits of comfort and control.
6. Standing Submission
If you’re feeling adventurous, try standing up! The sub can stand against a wall with their hands held above their head, either gently tied or just held by the dominant partner. Ankle restraints are optional, but they can help the sub feel a bit more grounded while adding a little thrill.
Why it’s fun: It adds a “hands up, all in” kind of feeling that’s simple but incredibly intense.
7. The Hogtie
If you’re up for a classic, the hogtie is about feeling completely at ease in your partner’s hands. The sub lies on their stomach with hands and feet tied gently behind them. This position takes away the ability to move but is completely safe with some quick-release cuffs or rope. It’s best for those who like the idea of letting their partner take full control.
Why it’s fun: It’s about trust! You’re giving over the reins and letting your partner do all the work.
8. Suspension (pros only)
Okay, so this one is advanced, but it can be a super cool experience for anyone with the right equipment. In suspension, the sub is lifted partially or fully off the ground. It can be playful or even calming. But this move needs real know-how, so it’s only for people who’ve done their research (and have the right ropes).
Why it’s fun: It’s like floating and feels almost magical! But safety is key – this one is for pros only.
Trying these 8 BDSM sex positions is about having fun and staying connected. Remember, it’s all about trust, communication, and building up the excitement – one little experiment at a time!
